Revelation

I had a revelation or an epiphany:  

I HAVE A CHRONIC PAIN DISORDER. 

Once I found out that I didn't have an autoimmune disorder, I started looking at what I actually have.  And that is a chronic pain disorder.  Yes, I am pretty much in pain all the time.  It's totally true.  I don't know why it took me so long to realize this.  Maybe I just thought that it was an autoimmune thing that happens to have accompanying pain.  But it isn't.  It's a disorder of pain, that happens to come with all the other crap I deal with.

I know this may sounds silly, but this really hit me.  It really opened my eyes and made me realize that yes, I am in pain pretty much 24/7.  Whether it be from my head, to an arm, to a leg, or to my back, I am in pain.  Yes, it does fluctuate between mild to severe, but it's there.

I feel that I now have such a greater knowledge of my own illness and I feel enlightened.